{"id":1279,"date":"2017-10-23T19:32:43","date_gmt":"2017-10-23T18:32:43","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/howtocruise.co.uk\/?p=1279"},"modified":"2017-10-23T19:32:43","modified_gmt":"2017-10-23T18:32:43","slug":"whats-worn-under-kilt","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/howtocruise.co.uk\/whats-worn-under-kilt\/","title":{"rendered":"What’s Really Worn Beneath a Kilt?"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"Kilt\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Can I share with you a funny, true story?<\/span><\/p>\n

Back in the day…<\/span><\/p>\n

I was 15 years old and still at school.<\/span><\/p>\n

And the end-of-year school musical-production was being staged.<\/span><\/p>\n

Now for some strange reason, I’d been asked to take part.<\/span><\/p>\n

The fact that I couldn’t sing didn’t seem to matter.<\/span><\/p>\n

\"Can't<\/a>
The fact that I couldn’t sing didn’t seem to matter<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

My part?<\/span><\/p>\n

I was to be a Scot. Complete with kilt.<\/span><\/p>\n

You see…<\/span><\/p>\n

North Sea oil was all the rage – and the school decided to perform a sketch around it.<\/span><\/p>\n

I remember the words well (to the tune of “The Sheik of Arabie”)…<\/span><\/p>\n

I’m a Scot from Aberdeen;<\/span><\/em><\/span>
\n The only wealth I’ve seen,<\/span><\/em><\/span>
\n Is when the rich carouse,<\/span><\/em><\/span>
\n And go to shoot the grouse.<\/span><\/em><\/span><\/p>\n

But now we’ve got this oil,<\/span><\/em><\/span>
\n My blood begins to boil;<\/span><\/em><\/span>
\n Yon clever London chaps,<\/span><\/em><\/span>
\n…and I won’t include the last line ‘cos it wouldn’t be considered appropriate nowadays!<\/span><\/em><\/span><\/p>\n

\"Shocked\"<\/a>
“I can’t believe you said that!”<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

What? No Kilt?<\/span><\/h2>\n

Anyway…<\/span><\/p>\n

I had one big problem.<\/span><\/p>\n

This Scot didn’t possess a kilt.<\/span><\/p>\n

And for a mega-star no-expense-spared school musical production, that was kinda important.<\/span><\/p>\n

Fortunately, a girl in our class had a tartan dress – and she offered to lend it to me.<\/span><\/p>\n

All good so far.<\/span><\/p>\n

And the performances went well.<\/span><\/p>\n

I even got my picture in the local paper.<\/span><\/p>\n

Fame at last for this ambitious 15-year-old.<\/span><\/p>\n

\"Sheik<\/a>
The 15-year-old was famous at last!<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

I Hijacked the Show<\/span><\/h2>\n

Now I’ve always been the type to enjoy a good laugh.<\/span><\/p>\n

Nothing nasty – just a little clean humour.<\/span><\/p>\n

And as the final night approached, I began to think about how I could liven up the event a little… with a little off-script laughter.<\/span><\/p>\n

You see…<\/span><\/p>\n

A question which has been asked throughout the centuries is this:<\/span><\/p>\n

What does a Scotsman wear beneath his kilt?<\/span><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Well, I decided, in my rather juvenile way, that I would show the audience exactly what was worn under a kilt.<\/span><\/p>\n

Calm down, missus! It’s not that at all!<\/span><\/p>\n

“Please Help Me, Grandma”<\/span><\/h2>\n

My Grandma had a very puzzled look when I asked her if I could borrow a pair of her bloomers.<\/span><\/p>\n

\"Bloomers\"<\/a>
“Please may I borrow your bloomers, Grandma?”<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

But I promised to look after them… so she helpfully obliged with a marvellous pair of bright pink bloomers which reached right down to the knees.<\/span><\/p>\n

For what happened on the final night of the production, I must sincerely apologise to all Scotsmen. But I hope you see the funny side of it…<\/span><\/p>\n

After the song, as I moved from the lower stage onto the upper stage… with my back to the audience…<\/span><\/p>\n

I tripped!<\/span><\/p>\n

The kilt went flying into the air, and the audience was in no doubt about what was worn beneath the kilt…<\/span><\/p>\n

A pair of bright pink bloomers!<\/span><\/p>\n

And I achieved a result…<\/span><\/p>\n

Laughter!<\/span><\/p>\n

Lots of it!<\/span><\/p>\n

Fortunately, the teachers saw the funny side of it too …or maybe they were simply too busy to notice.<\/span><\/p>\n

But I’d achieved my goal …and had got a laugh.<\/span><\/p>\n

\"Laugh\"<\/a>
The audience laughed<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

What’s That To Do With Cruising?<\/span><\/h2>\n

Well, on a cruise, you can have a good laugh.<\/span><\/p>\n

Whether it’s watching a comedian – or sharing funny stories over dinner.<\/span><\/p>\n

A cruise is a great time to de-stress.<\/span><\/p>\n

It’s a fantastic way to unwind.<\/span><\/p>\n

You can leave your problems at home and chill for a week or two.<\/span><\/p>\n

On a cruise, there’s so much entertainment going on. So be ready to have a good laugh. Be ready to enjoy yourself.<\/span><\/p>\n

Why not start by looking at Caribbean Cruises…<\/span><\/p>\n

\"Caribbean<\/a>
On a Caribbean cruise<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Why Caribbean Cruises?<\/span><\/h2>\n

Well… after the devastating storms Irma and Maria, the Caribbean Islands are gradually getting back to normality.<\/span><\/p>\n

Thankfully, the cruise companies are still going to many of them.<\/span><\/p>\n

But fewer people are booking Caribbean cruises.<\/span><\/p>\n

So, that means there are lots of attractive prices<\/em>.<\/span><\/p>\n

P&O, for example, is currently offering two-week island-hopping cruises for \u00a3999.<\/span><\/p>\n

That’s…<\/span><\/p>\n